Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Why do I write sad things in an NLP blog?

Sometimes I am asked this question directly, sometimes it is just implied by the context. If you check the twitter feed, you will find dozens of NLP "experts" writing cheery motivational sayings. They imply that you can out-think your life: that you can set goals and focus on them and build rapport and be happy all day, everyday.

I write what I write because I believe NLP and enriched communication help us build better lives. And I think we have to live those lives - not out-think them.

This spring, something I love and trusted and believed is disappearing. It's possible it is making way for something better. I have strong moments when I believe that. Not all of my moments are strong.

I am writing this for people like me, people with strong, bright goals and good heads and hearts who are struggling with something they didn't expect. Some of them have been blindsided by relationships, some by illness, some by changes in their work. Some of them are my clients and friends, and some are readers searching the web for company in a tough time. I want all of them to know that they do have company.

There are billions of people on the planet, and I suppose it's possible that some of them lead sunny, blessed lives where they only focus on good stuff and everything else just slides away. I have met people who are having hours or days or even years like that. I have never met anyone having a whole life like that.

As I write this, I am sad and tired and my heart is sore. Later today, I will lead a program and laugh and feel strong with the energy of the participants. I will stretch to get there, and I will get there with the help of some really terrific people in my life. I teach people to communicate and connect because everyone I teach is capable of giving something good to someone having a bad day. And everyone I teach is going to have some bumpy days that will be made better by the practices of reaching out and leaning on the connections they have with terrific people.

So if you are one of the people watching from near or far and giving me a lift in a difficult time, I am grateful. As my yoga teachers say, 'the light in me honours the light in you.' And if you are someone searching for reasons or a way forwardm I don't have either one for you. I do have this for you: 'the light in me honours the light in you.'

If there were no darkness, our lights would not shine so bright.

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