Friday, January 31, 2014

Have you wondered how the rose feels about loosening up?

I wonder why we expect growth to be comfortable. Getting better and feeling better are frequently not the same thing.

As a coach, one of my primary functions is to help people endure being uncomfortable while they are growing. When I am the one growing, this awareness helps me interpret the signals that I am uncomfortable so that I do not quit on something too soon.

The caterpillar might actually know what it will be like to be a butterfly, and the rose might not mind giving up the tight curling petals of the bud for the splendour of the rose in full bloom. But a person knows down to their bones that it is hard to know oneself. Growth means getting to know a different self. It means going through all the klutziness and awkwardness of not knowing how big or strong  you really are.

Look around you. If someone you know is growing (physically or emotionally), don't expect it to be all giggles. Expect that growth requires support because it isn't very comfortable while it is happening. If you are growing, find the people and situations that distract you from the feeling that you do not quite fit in your skin.

In less time than you will fear, you will take a break from growth and simply live in your skin. And when you do, you'll be glad to own the new strength and awareness that developed in the process of growing.

If you're curious about how people change and grow and decide, visit me at www.nlpcanada.com.

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