Integrate!

This post will be a little different. If you're not feeling the poetry, tune in next week. If there's one thing I  have learned It is this. You will never reach the light by climbing By stretching for the skies By skimming over the surface. You have to dig deep for the light Under the hurt, under the hope, under the things That have never quite healed. You have to dig deep for the light Undistracted by the wind or the noise of things that fly. And if I see you With dark eyes and a shovel I'll bring you a cool drink And a bite to eat. And if I see you I will look through The darkness in your eyes To see the glimmer of the light So you will know It's worth it to keep digging For the light you cannot see You have to dig deep For the light.

Is this what confidence looks like to you? Some people think confidence comes from deep roots in tradition and thought and money. Some people think it comes from looking like people and institutions that are backed by authority. They think confidence looks like long-held power. If this is what you think you need to achieve in order to feel confident, then confidence can seem impossible.  I think confidence looks like a two-year-old shouting bus! I think it looks like someone in a kitchen, peeling potatoes without thought because she's peeled a million before that. I think it looks like the grin before the shot gets taken.  There's a lot you don't know and will never know. That doesn't stop you from enjoying the thing you have just learned. It doesn't stop you from knowing what you know right down to the bones because you've practiced it forever. It doesn't stop you from taking joy in playing the game. The thing that stops you from having...

Buy it at Amazon It works every time, even if you're speaking a second language or working in a field that is new to you. Here's the magic formula for effective communication: knowing what you want + paying attention to other people = words that work.  I know this seems too hard. I know you are tempted by the people who teach another script, another voice lesson, another theory of body language that will supercharge your communication. I know that it seems easier to work on your words than it does to work on being so clear about the results you want that you are able to dedicate most of your attention to the people you want to influence. Attention is harder to manage and maintain than a script. But scripts don't work well without it. Your attention is signalled by energy: people notice when you're directing energy at them. They pay attention to it. And when they do, your words can ride that energy and land deeply and effectively. But if you expect the...

Today is July 1 - Canada Day, and because Canada 150 is a big deal, it's been greeted with big protests. Everywhere on social media, protestors are disrupting the celebration because Canada has not always been good to them or for them. I get it. You're mad. Somebody screwed up and you want us to fix it (even though exactly how to do that is up for some debate). You're angry because you're stuck and you don't see a way to make it better. You're angry because you're black, you're indigenous, you're left wing, you're right wing, or you've been left out in the rain or out of the speech (sorry, Alberta). Here are some house rules you might consider based on something called the six step reframe in NLP: 1) it's better when you can generate lots of new ideas - innovation takes cooperation and respect 2) the best ideas come from our best selves - the ones Canadians try to remember in celebrating a national birthday (ideals li...